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Take it with a sense of humor
The other night a good friend invited me to visit the QuatschComedyClub with her.
I don't go out often, and when I do, I usually go to outdoor festivities, such as medieval and Christmas markets. In this respect I immediately thought about which of my fragrances would be most suitable for such an indoor evening. He wasn't allowed to be too intrusive or space-consuming and so I decided on my current signature scent "Tsarina Intensivo", which is a clear ever-goer for me in a sparse dose.
My girlfriend picked me up punctually at 19 o'clock from home and already when I got into her car I noticed that something was wrong. Something stuffy...
I sniffed my clothes as inconspicuously as possible, like a sniffer dog searching for the one tiny molecule that tells him where what he is looking for is. But nothing!
"Tsarina" stuck to me like an intimate veil and there was nothing else.
The muffin had retreated and merged with the smell of the car leather beyond recognition. It could not be detected anymore.
When we arrived at the theatre it was full, breaking full!
So we carefully pushed our way through the crowd to the bar and ordered 2 soft drinks.
It has been a long time since I was exposed to such a scent chaos (usually I avoid cramped rooms with high crowds) and accordingly I could escape the flood of wafting scents and odours, especially since I am generally very easily flooded with stimuli. I smelled the cigarette smoke that blew in from outside, the different flavors of beer from bottles and mouths, the paprika spice from the cheese nachos that some ate, the sweet-sticky popcorn, various "0-8-15 perfumes" (which I don't mean negative here, but none particularly stood out) AND the latent buffalo from the car. There it was again!
The doors to the theatre hall opened and the masses began to set themselves in motion.
We had gotten good seats, right in the middle of the hall with the prophylactic safety distance to the stage, which should avoid that one of us could become part of the entertainment program at the end.
We hadn't sat for a minute, when the dessert crawled over to me again. But this time I didn't try to find out the starting point anymore, but took a closer look at the smell itself: it was discreet, not a classic stinker, sweet and somehow... yes... what's the best way to describe it...? Rotten? It smelled a little like sour or fermented milk, like a mixture of overripe bananas and artificial vanilla aroma, creamy and... That's when it crossed my mind! It smelled to me like breast milk vomited from an infant!
Now that I had tried to analyse the smell more closely, I unfortunately couldn't get it out of my nose at all. He clawed himself to my perception like a fucking clamp monkey! I realized I'd have to live with him for the next two hours...
But then the much worse realization came to me: He radiated from my girlfriend! Because she's not a mother, it had to be her perfume
What kind of brew would that merely be?
The break brought a breath of fresh air and relief. Suddenly I enjoyed the potpourri of people and smells crowding the foyer. This now seemed like a welcome change to me.
But I don't wear my pseudonym here without good reason, because now that I had identified the source of the muffin, the curiosity was aroused and I just had to know what that was.
So I asked my girlfriend straight out about her new perfume. And she answered me proudly: "Dangerous Woman by Bruno Banani. Beautiful, isn't it?"
"Uh, no, not really...", I thought and wondered how I could skilfully circumnavigate this fat little fat glob...
Thanks to Parfumo, I quickly received a rescuing answer: "I have to have a look at Parfumo's fragrance pyramid!"
So Zack, the smartphone pulled out and read all for me quietly:
Mmmhhh... black currant (I don't smell it!)... Coconut milk (yeah, more like it)... Gourmand notes (definitely!) and vanilla absolute (definitely, but of the nasty synthetic variety!). Exotic flowers... Does titanium root also count??
"Dangerous Woman," well, not really. The only dangerous thing I'm going to get here is my tired penetrance. But honestly, the fragrance pyramid does not sound bad at all, could possibly even fit into my bag scheme.
Was it due to the skin chemistry of my girlfriend or only to my individual perception??
It didn't matter at all, because the fact was that I would be granted another hour after the break with the little baby coon in my nose.
But what the hell. As long as the comedians' jokes don't suck like this Banani, I'll take it with humor ;-)