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![NuiWhakakore]()
NuiWhakakore
Top Review
46
Just another day on the Bright Star
My name is Bob Frugge and I am, nominally at least, the commander of the Bright Star. We have a flat hierarchy here, as they say. A euphemism for: not a pig cares what I say. The pig's name is Lucius Weasley III, which is all the crew I have, and sometimes I'd be happy not to have any at all. He goes by Eight. I have no idea why, either. For the sake of humanity, though, I hope there will never be a Lucius Weasley VIII. That would be a win for everyone.
The Bright Star is actually also called NGC 891, but that doesn't sound like it. We've been traveling in the Kuiper Belt for 136 days. We're diverting the trajectory of suitable objects so that they can be captured and exploited near Saturn. Pushing asteroids, it's called. And it sounds more exciting than it is. Especially with someone like Eight as a colleague.
It smells like lime again. So it's Tuesday. Days of the week don't matter out here, of course. It's the smell that the cleaning robot gives off when it mops the floors. A different agent is used for this each day of the week. I guess someone thought it would add variety to the routine. Stupid idea, after 136 days it's just annoying. Tomorrow is sandalwood day, yesterday was spices, Saturday is always patchouli. Of course, all synthetic.
I'm shuffling across the laminate-covered floor to the bridge right now. I guess the laminate is supposed to lift your spirits, too. I rather think it was the cheapest way to insulate the floor. But maybe I'm just in a bad mood today. On the bridge, I squeeze into my faux leather chair and stare ahead. Eight sits next to me and stares, too. Everything as usual.
"Change of course in 10 minutes. Manual confirmation required."
Oh crap, that too. That was Elvi, our on-board computer. Actually ElVI, for ELecronic Virual Inteligence. If there's anything we like less than each other, it's Elvi. We're both of the opinion that you could safely drop the "i".
"Your turn, Three," I say to Eight. That reliably brings him up to 180.
"You can forget it, I was last time, BLOB!" he retorts.
At this point I'd like to interject that the sporting facilities on the Bright Star are limited and so I'm slightly off my ideal weight, but I'm no BLOB!
"You pseudo-noble fop, your parents are farmers on Io!" i hiss back.
"Terrraformer!"
A whiff of his aftershave wafts over, lavender, I could puke. It goes on like that for a while, until a little light starts flashing red. Elvi must have been saying something for a while, we completely overheard.
"One minute to course change. Manual confirmation required. If none of you knob heads press the red button, we will crash on lx5-671. It would be nice if one of you would move a little."
The red button is an arm's length away from me. From Eight, though, too.
"You heard me, now get on with it" I say.
"I did the last time and the time before that too!"
"Now go ahead, that's an order!"
"Pffft."
"Ten seconds to go before the required course change. Thank you for observing all safety precautions.
10...
9...
8...
7.."
Flat hierarchies are a very bad idea in spaceflight, I think. Today is another one of those days.
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The Egypt starts decently fresh with some sweet lime and more obvious spices, cardamom before nutmeg, but the whole rather muted and musty. Then comes a bit of herbaceous lavender and some moss. This makes it better and dispels the mustiness a bit. The spices are clearly in the upper hand compared to the green notes though. Then in the base, creamy sandalwood (I still find this the best part of the whole scent) and faux leather. Patch is more of a trace element.
The Eight & Bob has about as much to do with Egypt as it does with the Kuiper belt. Due to its consistent synthetic perhaps but even more with the Kuiper belt. In principle, I don't find the synthetic so bad, you can do that, even if it's not my cup of tea. It's just that you shouldn't notice it quite so clearly. It is also not one note, but all. In every phase of the fragrance I think to myself: nice, but already very artificial. Others do that much better. The price is for me also in no relation to the performance. I would not buy it, however, even for 30 euros at the discounter. Who is open to purely synthetic fragrances, he may feel quite different.
The durability is also not particularly, which is in this case but perhaps even an advantage.
Should the Bright Star crash on the asteroid, it is at least not too bad about the cleaning agents.
Thanks to Toppine, I'd rather stick with Master Cleaner!
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RisingChaos
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